The New Stop, Drop, And Roll: How the Green, Yellow, Red Light Method Might Save Your Loved One’s Life in a Mental Health Crisis
- Mina Tobias
- Aug 28
- 4 min read
By Mina Tobias, Co-Founder, VP, Don't MiND Me Foundation
If you’re like me, you want to walk away from this article having learned crucial information about a problem you face, equipped with a new skill to handle it. I have just the thing.
Are you or a loved one currently struggling with a mental health issue? If the answer is yes, and the answer is always yes, then welcome to the club! The good news? It’s a great club to be a part of once you’re through the thick of the storm. That may sound impossible right now, but after over fifteen years in the mental health field, I can promise you this community is filled with the most passionate innovators and steadfast allies that you’ll ever meet.
Let me very quickly rewind to introduce myself as the author, so that you know I’m not an AI bot feeding you a soulless em dash-riddled essay. My name is Mina Tobias (a real girl!) and I am the co-founder of the mental health nonprofit Don’t MiND Me (a real 501(c)(3) foundation!). If you attend Lido events, you may have heard myself and my mom & co-founder Mädchen Amick (a real, iconic actress) discuss our family’s history with mental illness. You might be familiar with the story of my brother’s Bipolar 1 diagnosis, his decade-long journey through dozens of institutions that failed him before finding treatment that worked, and our family’s unyielding determination to reform mental healthcare so that your family has an easier time than we did.
Have you heard of the Green, Yellow, Red Light Method for mental health? It was several years ago when we learned this trick from trusted mental health professionals and through the grapevine of friends who had lifelong experience navigating their own mental illnesses. It has helped us transform the fear of "waiting for the other shoe to drop" into a practical plan.
Step One: acknowledge that this system is best implemented before crisis. If you or a loved one are currently in crisis, follow emergency protocols by contacting 911 or 988 and working with medical professionals to determine the safest next steps.
Step Two: when not in crisis, ask the honest question: “who are the three people in your life that you would trust to advise you in crisis?” Then, make sure the person with the mental health condition is in the driver’s seat, and build a plan with this trusted core group. Note that this is NOT an intervention; this is a nonjudgemental brainstorming conversation about the steps and interventions leading up to crisis.
Step Three: Make a list of what behaviors have led to crisis in the past. Perhaps it’s a drastic change in sleep pattern, or noticeable isolation compared to normal, or an uptick in posting on social media, or other lifestyle shifts. The more detailed, the better! Once you have your list, decide on the call-to-action; if these signs start appearing again, do you have permission to contact their care team?
Decide on the communication process that works best. Maybe it’s a group chat, a monthly check-in, whatever feels best for the loved one. Now onto the lights!
GREEN LIGHT: all three of the core group agree that no concerning signs are present. They’re managing their mental health hygiene, taking their necessary medication (if that applies), exhibiting normal behavioral patterns. No action necessary, just keep on keeping on! Maybe even throw in some positive encouragement, it’s always great to hear feedback when things are going well, not just in crisis mode.
YELLOW LIGHT: two of three core group members express concerns about any behaviors from the list. It’s time to check in with the care team and potentially make adjustments before symptoms get worse. Perhaps a higher or lower dose of medication, or more frequent check-ins with their therapist, or maybe it’s just navigating a challenging life event. This is the critical time to acknowledge concerns so that changes can be made before things snowball into crisis.
RED LIGHT: all three core group members are concerned and crisis intervention protocol is implemented. It’s time to alert the care team, get them somewhere safe (it may be an emergency room), and ‘put out the fire.’
Why does this work? The impossible juxtaposition of mental illness is that the organ responsible for judgement is hijacked in crisis, but life-saving decisions need to be made ASAP. That's why having a plan made during periods of stability can be so powerful. Just like we prepare for fires or earthquakes before they happen, preparing for a mental health emergency allows everyone to respond with greater confidence and less confusion.
Keys for success: always make sure your loved one has agency in building the plan. When concerns are being raised, ensure everyone is a part of the conversation. Understand that if a crisis reaches the red light stage, the agreed-upon protocol will be followed because safety comes first.
Last, I want to acknowledge that I’m not a licensed therapist; this is just what’s worked for us. There may be other more helpful ways that work for you because every diagnosis is unique to the individual and the family unit. At best I hope learning this method adds to your toolbox, and at worst I hope this sparks meaningful conversation about how to prepare for challenging moments.
About Don’t MiND Me Foundation:
Our darkest moments led us to create the Don’t MiND Me Foundation: we now lead advocacy initiatives on the local and national level, we provide an annual scholarship fund that connects people into treatment who have insufficient payment options, and we’re developing our very own treatment center designed to provide a wide range of integrative services addressing mental health and substance use disorder.
If you’d like to get involved and support our work,or would like to share if this letter resonated with you, I’d be honored to hear from you. Please connect with me at contact@dontmindme.org or stay in touch on our socials @dontmindme.
